Little Star & Little Bird

Since when does it matter that it might not be good enough?

Since when does it mean something so big and huge and important that you might not win?

Have you ever seen someone inspiring?
What inspired you?


Certainly not the way they took everything out of their way, leaving nothing but a straight path.
Certainly not.

So why do we think it should be so easy for ourselves?

I want to inspire.

Maybe I do.

You know, I love fashion but I'm afraid of it.
I wonder why that is?

I follow so many fashion blogs. They start my day and often finish it.

I want to take photographs and write about them for a living.

I want to draw.

I want to find love.
I want to find that one person who makes my stomach feel like I've swallowed a million mexican jumping beans.
I want to find someone who will come over when I'm sick, and who won't care how nasty I am.
I want to find someone I can look at everyday, and everyday know that he is beautiful, and constantly find a new way he is.
I want to fall asleep on someone's stomach again, waking up only because time is always an essence.

I want to have someone I think is a gift

[all people are gifts, am I right? All persons are something to value, never mind have something to value.]

I want to not just have someone, but be had. And have it not matter how many came before or might come after for either one of us. I want to breathe in and act on impulse. If I want to kiss someone, damn it, why don't I? Why haven't I?

I want to go to Europe this spring break, and finally DO the fashion thing! WHY NOT?

I want to go for walks in the rain and come home and take a bath. I want to get soaked in these puddles. I want to have Ester home; she'd dance with me in the rain.

I remember one day before school, Ee and I were at school really early. We ended up walking to Starbucks in the POURING rain. And I mean, within 5 minutes we were so wet, nothing mattered anymore. We jumped in puddles, and screamed and laughed and got coffee that was so watered down it was ridiculous. We got to school drenched. We changed into gym clothes and missed the morning classes, as we waited for the dryer to finish with our clothing.

I'm fine alone.
But that doesn't mean I wouldn't prefer the alternative.

I can't picture me without you, even on the days I am.
And that sentence goes out to two different people, oddly enough.
Two different loves, two different kinds.

Love?

It's so easy to spend my days upbeat and "big" (as Longtin would say, BE BIG!)
It's so easy.
But I love sitting at home with my notebooks
my scrapbooks
my cameras
my guitar
my books
my paints.

I love sitting down, talking to you on the phone.
You know me. A few sides
You say I still surprise you, which is great.

I love being so calm when I'm with you.
What is it about you that makes me take a step back most of time?

Once upon a time there was a little star.
It lived so very high up, in the sky.
Little star had a friend named little bird.
Little Bird was little, but she was able to fly up just high enough, and Little Star was able to sink just low enough, that they were able to spend lots of time together.
Little Bird and Little Star loved eachother very much.
But Little Star was a star, and as the Earth turned, it took her away from her Little Bird.
Little Bird cryed and cryed and cryed, she was so said.
She tried to fly after Little Star, but her wings were too weak to keep up.
So, Little Bird accepted her place in the world.
She waited patiently.

She had faith that one day, the Earth would turn again in her favour, bringing her Little Star back to her.
And by then- her wings would be strong enough so that she'd never be left behind again.

MAYBE THIS MEANS MORE TO ME THAN I EVER WANTED;
NINETY NINE DAYS

Best friends

taking odd sideways photos at safeway? yes.
we do that.

I love you like a favourite pair of jeans.

Means everytime we talk, no matter how much has changed,

nothing really has.

What would i do in life without my best friends?
Specifically, that one?

-Points-

Means fighting to the death over a cell phone, or the last piece of pizza, and laughing at the loser. "Too bad sucker!" we'd shout, and then help the other person off the ground, only to push them down, and run away screaming.

Remember that time, Ee, when we went out walking in the summer?
It was really really hot, and we went to VV? I bought a big man shirt. We stole a balloon, didn't we? Or did we just think about it?
And we got lost trying to get back to me house.

Remember when in grade 10, H and I stole you? You were heading to practicum, and we kidnapped you, took you to the mall instead? We called to tell the school you couldn't make it, and low and behold, there was no school that day anyways! We went to the mall, laughing, had A&W, and bought some nonesense stuff.

Remember when we would be bored and restless, and say, MEET YOU HALF WAY, and run to the half way point between our houses, at which point we would collide and just lay on some strangers lawn, laughing? Remember the day I brought you chocolate?

Remember the day you me and your dad went out for coffee at tims? We got back to your house, and there was an offer for it right there on the counter as you and I walked in. We knew the house would be sold then, and we joked too loudly about tearing it up or hiding it. And I sat on your RIDICULOUSLY steep stairs, and tried not to cry? And you freaked out, tried to cheer me up, and slipped on the floor? Remember how empty your house felt that day?

Remember the day you and that guy broke up? And we just ran at eachother in the halls, and hugged, both of us crying? Even that guy i was with hugged you, you were so sad? Remember how much rootbeer you drank that day?

Wow, remember root beer? Remember how everyday we would drink root beer? Remember how we couldnt survive precal without one? Remember precal, for that matter? That semester was a disaster!

Remember Mr.Howdle? And how we would walk out of his class when the weather was nice, and eat pizza outside, and not go back til class was over? Remember Mr.Fritze, and the other guy? Remember the point system?!

Remember "Pebbles?"

Remember the tracks? How everything was better on the tracks. We lived our lives on the tracks.

Remember the day I told you what happened between crocs and me?

And the floor? And the droopy asparagus, cooked asparagus, CUCMBER? Remember the limo ride, and all those blasted mini doughtnuts?

Remember our downtown adventures? The picnic table, the park, "polo park", the exchange? Remember Zac, and meeting him? Remember the fair trade expo?

OH!
Remember that morning when it was raining, but we were at school early, so we went for a walk to starbucks? We were SOAKED by the time we got back to school, and had to wear gym clothing as our real ones were in the foods room drier?

All the faces we made?

Scientology?

Oh my gosh... Ee how much have we done and been through together.

Us, just two broke artists, who know ALL about the evils of retail and fast food. We're gonna grow up and be the same as ever.

Hell, we are growing up, aren't we?
Idunno. I guess all this was just to say --

For Ee : I cherish you. Never will there be another person in my life like you, or as important to me as you are. And everyday I tell SOMEONE a story about you or us.

For everyone : Hold tight to your best friend, make sure they know theyre loved, make sure you know you love them. Go have an adventure with them. You know they want one too.